905
We cater any event! (sh.itjust.works)
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[-] AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works 26 points 3 days ago

This just unlocked one of my weirdest childhood memories. I played fastpitch softball as a kid, and at one away game the school's softball field was next to a pasture. During warmups and the first several innings, we watched a guy dig a hole in the pasture. In the second inning or so, we hear a gunshot off in the distance, and the third has a truck dragging a horse corpse to the big hole. The man shoved the horse corpse into the grave, and takes three innings to bury the horse.

At the team huddle after the game, one of my teammates said an eulogy for the horse.

[-] WarmSoda@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

I think we've made some great progress today, don't you? How does next Tuesday at 11 sound for our follow up.

[-] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 4 points 2 days ago

That’s brutal…

I went to a middle school that sat next to a farm. A number of our athletic matches were canceled due to the cows getting out and one was canceled because the farmer shot a coyote on our baseball field & left it.

[-] dogsoahC@lemm.ee 105 points 4 days ago

We really should start celebrating T u e s d a y s.

[-] Num10ck@lemmy.world 20 points 4 days ago

Tuesdays are the most productive day of the week. Not a time for celebration, its business time.

[-] dogsoahC@lemm.ee 22 points 4 days ago

All the more reason to reduce productivity. Flatten the curve, lower expectations. Tuesday is the scab of weekdays. The other days need to strike.

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[-] psychonova@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 4 days ago

could we celebrate wednesdays instead? tuesdays are my weekly catered drug intervention with my mother.

[-] Routhinator@startrek.website 12 points 4 days ago

Throw a dead horse into the mix and we have a party.

[-] billwashere@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago

You really can’t beat a dead horse as a reason for a party.

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[-] NikkiDimes@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I heard that line in Bill Wurtz voice for some reason

[-] flicker@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago

Truly the voice of several generations.

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[-] ClamDrinker@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago

"You know you don't need to bring a dead horse every time you want catering right, Jim?"

[-] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 3 points 2 days ago

“Jim has returned! But this time he brought us a live horse…. you think he’s still going to ask us to cater its funeral?”

[-] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 31 points 3 days ago

A catered quiet night alone sounds pretty dope actually.

[-] dumbass@leminal.space 19 points 3 days ago

Waiter comes up with a tray: pig in a blanket?

Me half stoned laying in bed: the fuck did you call me?

[-] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 2 points 2 days ago

Another one comes around to gather your empty champagne glasses…

“This one’s still full, want me to leave it?”

“Nah, you can dump it. I wasn’t up for going to the toilet after being called a pig in a blanket…”

[-] NaoPb@eviltoast.org 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Catering companies would love to bring you food for 10 people and the plates to keep it warm for your quiet night alone. All you gotta do is pay.

[-] EarthShipTechIntern@lemm.ee 3 points 2 days ago

Do they provide written material on 'How to beat a dead horse'?

Maybe a dummies guide?

[-] pigup@lemmy.world 44 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Horse funeral

Horse funeral 2

Horse funeral: truly aww-foal

Horse funeral: equinity

[-] werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 17 points 4 days ago

Like beating a dead horse.

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 11 points 4 days ago

You both stop that shit right now

[-] SeekPie@lemm.ee 3 points 3 days ago

You're saying they should stop horsing around?

[-] klemptor@startrek.website 38 points 4 days ago
[-] phorq@lemmy.ml 17 points 4 days ago

Honestly, if I ran a catering business I might put up the same sign. What's the worst that can happen? 3 horse funerals?

[-] HEXN3T@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 days ago

OOOHHHH so THAT'S where that pre-cracked egg comes from. I didn't know that was a whole joke account and store.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 30 points 3 days ago
[-] nailbar@sopuli.xyz 6 points 3 days ago

They should have put that one above the second horse funeral.

[-] qbus@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

Jim is the horse

[-] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago
[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

He went out for cigarettes and never came back!

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[-] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 50 points 4 days ago

Do you think they'd cater a horse funeral?

[-] Zier@fedia.io 21 points 4 days ago

What?? NO! Don't be silly. Where did you even get such a crazy idea? Are you even serious right now??? I mean, I have no words... A horse funeral, who even does that!

[-] Hugh_Jeggs@lemm.ee 14 points 4 days ago
[-] teegus@sh.itjust.works 8 points 4 days ago

Horse funerals are not a joke, Jim!

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[-] MissJinx@lemmy.world 12 points 4 days ago

Bye bye lil sebastian

[-] BudgetBandit@sh.itjust.works 9 points 4 days ago

Only T U E S D A Y S

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[-] AeonFelis@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago

Can they do an horse funeral on a Tuesday? It's not clear from the text.

[-] aphonefriend@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 days ago

Come inside for a free consultation.

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[-] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 25 points 4 days ago

Careful. Read their reviews online and I'm not so sure about this place. They served deviled eggs at the return of Jim and everyone knew Jim hated eggs. Some people argued this was even why Jim left again and didn't stay returned.

[-] lugal@lemmy.world 21 points 4 days ago

Jim is back? Why didn't anybody tell me? Is he doing fine?

[-] marble@sh.itjust.works 18 points 4 days ago

Jim the horse? I'm afraid I have bad news for you.

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[-] Tja@programming.dev 13 points 3 days ago

Bye... Bye... 🎶 Lil' Sebastian... 🎶

[-] CuttingBoard@sopuli.xyz 4 points 3 days ago

I miss him in the saddest fashion.

[-] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 3 days ago

Finally, someone to cater my horse wedding with drugs on a quiet Tuesday night!

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago

If they bring a mariachi band I'm sold

[-] Aceticon@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

It would be especially appropriate for a horse funeral were the animal was used to bring contraband over the Sierra Morena or was called Cielito Lindo

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

I just want mariachi band to play Y Los Cielos on the other side of the door when I'm trying to squeeze out a really tough one, but that would be rude to them and those years are past.

[-] Kerb@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 4 days ago

"For You, The Day Bison Graced Your Village Was The Most Important Day Of Your Life. But For Me, It Was TUESDAY"

[-] NaoPb@eviltoast.org 4 points 3 days ago

Where is the catering in this thread?

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this post was submitted on 24 Jun 2024
905 points (98.7% liked)

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