this post was submitted on 16 May 2025
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badposting

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badposting is a comm where you post badly


This is not a !the_dunk_tank@hexbear.net alternative. This is not a !memes@hexbear.net alternative. This is a place for you to post your bad posts.

Ever had a really shitty bit idea? Joke you want to take way past the point of where it was funny? Want to feel like a stand-up comedy guy who's been bombing a set for the past 30 minutes straight and at this point is just saying shit to see if people react to it? Really bad pun? A homemade cringe concoction? A cognitohazard that you have birthed into this world and have an urge to spread like chain mail?


Rules:

  1. Do not post good posts.
    • Unauthorized goodposting is to be punished in the manner of commenting the phrase "GOOD post" followed by an emoji that has not yet been used in the thread
    • Use an emoticon/kaomoji/rule-three-abiding ASCII art if the rations run out
  2. This is not a comm where you direct people to other people's bad posts. This is a comm where you post badly.
  3. This rule intentionally left blank.
  4. If you're struck for rule 3, skill issue, not allowed to complain about it.

Code of Conduct applies just as much here as it does everywhere else. Technically, CoC violations are bad posts. On the other hand: L + ratio + get ~~better~~ worse material bozo

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The most annoying, unfunny, obscure bit ideas you've ever had are supposed to go here

all 38 comments
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[–] 30_to_50_Feral_PAWGs@hexbear.net 12 points 3 months ago

Open a haunted house where I jump-scare people and if they react at all, I scoff and call them a transphobe.

[–] D61@hexbear.net 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

A driver bit that instantly strips the head of any screw you try it on.

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 6 points 3 months ago

yeah they're called philips head. also pozidriv.

[–] Keld@hexbear.net 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I set up hundreds of different accounts to post to make this otherwise dead forum "Hexbear" seem alive. Honestly it's just me and like one other user posting.

[–] durruticore@hexbear.net 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

damn. so it is just me and you?

[–] Keld@hexbear.net 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Suuuuure, you're totally not my alt owl-wink

[–] ButtBidet@hexbear.net 10 points 3 months ago (5 children)

I really want to find a nemesis on Hexbear. Them and I could shit on each other in the comments randomly and everyone would just think "why the fuck do ButtBidet and SovietTruckDriver hate each other so much". Like there's a news post and one of use would go "this is almost as bad as the time that ButtBidet ...."

Too involved of a bit to do it, though.

[–] durruticore@hexbear.net 9 points 3 months ago

"SovietTruckDriver, almost like AssTruckDriver"

[–] KuroXppi@hexbear.net 7 points 3 months ago
[–] WhatDoYouMeanPodcast@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago

This is the shit I'm talking about. ButtBidet always comes up with the most F-tier, dogshit bits

[–] spudnik@hexbear.net 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Like there's a news post and one of use would go "this is almost as bad as the time that ButtBidet ...."

This is like Lenin talking about Kautsky lol

Edit: or we could all collectively invent a Stirner for you to inveigh against

Yo fuck you asshole!

[–] HelluvaBottomCarter@hexbear.net 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Convince Trump that the Statue of Liberty should undergo restoration to make her prettier.

[–] 9to5@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago

Give the statue some big ol bazoogas

[–] gramxi@hexbear.net 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

pretend to be a ridiculously unhinged anti-communist on lemmy to annoy everybody into being more sympathetic to us. Unfortunately the my cm0002 account just keeps getting upvotes, so I will need to rethink my strategy.

[–] mayo_cider@hexbear.net 3 points 3 months ago

Every once in a while I get an urge to respond with a five page tankie essay just for the meme

I usually get bored after the third reference

[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

world challenge shitting championships 2025

with photographic entries

[–] KuroXppi@hexbear.net 2 points 3 months ago

You're just afraid of the competition

[–] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

1337Hax0r, exclusively post in 1337 speak and 2000s g*mer memes.

lol n00b, pwned liek Leeroy Jenkins! kekekekeke zerg rush ^________^

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 3 points 3 months ago

7r075ky 53n7 4 5i11y 13773r. W3 5h411 n3i7h3r 6r1n7 17, n0r r3p1y.

[–] GrafZahl@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago

Not my original idea but, what if a bit had three possible states instead of two?

[–] userofnames@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago

Philips PH-2

[–] batsforpeace@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago

engage in serious newsmega discourse but talk like the ‘soz mate’ guy

[–] CrawlMarks@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago

I posted in one of these threads before and my bit was too bad and it got deleted. Fool me twice and you can't fool me again

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 4 points 3 months ago

torx plus but with 2 non-opposing spines slightly shortened so you can only fit the bit in one exact way

[–] rubber_chicken@hexbear.net 4 points 3 months ago

0 but it's permanent and can't be overwritten. View a screen full of them and you've bricked your monitor.

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 4 points 3 months ago

a rifled peg made out of talc

[–] NinjaGinga@hexbear.net 3 points 3 months ago

J-D-P-O-N-D-O-N a la Saturday Night by City Rollers I just can't get any other lyrics down beyond "J-D-P-O-N-D-O-N Hey!"

[–] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 2 points 3 months ago

Yakub with inventing white people. Worst bit of all time.

[–] ComradeSpahija@hexbear.net 2 points 3 months ago

Grok but instead of white genocide he constantly feels the need to discuss people posting a photo of a pig pooping on it's own balls on hexbear dot net.

[–] ClassIsOver@hexbear.net 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

barely ovular-shaped drill bits with spherical tips. Nintendo and Apple will the the first adopters.

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 3 points 3 months ago

I'm not sure if I'm missing the joke here but these exist. those automated coffee machines use them

[–] Homer_Simpson@hexbear.net 2 points 3 months ago

Disgracing the tomb of the unknown solider

[–] Damarcusart@hexbear.net 2 points 3 months ago

Instead of a bit being a 0 or a 1, they can be a 5 or 6.