this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2024
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askchapo

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[–] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 39 points 1 month ago
[–] ReadFanon@hexbear.net 38 points 1 month ago

You log off, who dies?

My only contact with the outside world

[–] DivineChaos100@hexbear.net 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

“There's an old saying on Reddit — I know it's on Hexbear, probably on Reddit — that says, log out once, shame on — shame on you. Log out — you can't log out again.”

[–] propter_hog@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

"Log out one time, shame on you. Log out two times, can't put the blame on you. Log out three times, fuck the peace sign, load the chopper let it rain on you."

[–] FnordPrefect@hexbear.net 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Joe Biden, but that's just playing the odds really biden-fall

[–] RNAi@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Year of the 4 presidents pls 🤞

[–] WorkingClassCorpse@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

For a split second I thought you meant 4 presidents dying in a year - wouldn't that be neat

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[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 24 points 1 month ago

I don't want to log off, but if it meant Matt Walsh got crushed by a trash compactor, I would tearfully say farewell for sure

[–] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 22 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)
[–] HiImThomasPynchon@hexbear.net 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Knowing my luck, probably Parenti.

And if that's the case, why haven't you logged off yet?

Look me in the eye and tell me you want our precious yellow man to die

parenti

[–] Bureaucrat@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

keeping you chained up in our posting gulag forever uwu

[–] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

You log off, who dies?

Probably me. Also weak bait, i'm not gonna touch grass.

[–] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Aradina@lemmy.ml 28 points 1 month ago (6 children)

He's just injured after a fall as far as I know

[–] Bureaucrat@hexbear.net 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

hes not dead? I misunderstood the news again :sadness: fixed the title

[–] Aquilae@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"Dives" lmfao

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 13 points 1 month ago

Damn, maybe next time

[–] MolotovHalfEmpty@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago

If Prager was dead I assume I and everyone else on Earth would have gotten a gleeful phonecall from Dave Anthony to tell us the news personally.

[–] Pili@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago

He can still die though, we shouldn't lose hope.

[–] KimJongGoku@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

Don't mind the people saying he's not actually dead yet, here's Penis Prager commenting on the matter:

[–] WorkingClassCorpse@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

I will be sending this to my reactionary family members when he finally kicks it, thank you comrade

rat-salute-2

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[–] doublepepperoni@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

He isn't actually dead

Well that's my day ruined dean-frown

[–] WittyProfileName2@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

An elderly Scottish woman named Gladys.

Long ago, when Gladys was young and reckless, she stumbled upon the book within which all fate is written. Skimming through the pages, she came upon the moment of her death and in a fit of rage and fear tore it free from the book. Hence forth she cannot die until the conditions of the page are complete. The last remaining of which is that I log off from Hexbear.

Fearing her coming demise, she has cursed me that should she die then so shall I and thus we are locked within this eternal cosmic struggle. Neither of us allowed to meet our final fate until the logout button is pressed.

[–] ikilledtheradiostar@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What if you hit refresh on the site and get a 502?

[–] WittyProfileName2@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The sun blinks shut like an eye.

Under the gaze of this profane eclipse, it will fall to me to journey to Scotland, find Gladys, and defeat her before her dread power can reassert itself.

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

poggers, good luck with Gladys

[–] roux@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago

If I've logged off it just means I died fighting in the counter-counter-revolution during the great socialist uprising in the West after the Second US Civil War. For the Revolution!

But no serious, I have no life and shitposting is therapy for me.

[–] HelluvaBottomCarter@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago
[–] MohammedTheCommunistPalestinian@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Noooo pup is legion pup will never die kitty-cri-screm

[–] CommunistBear@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

One pup falls, another picks up their keyboard and continues posting

[–] propter_hog@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

@Bureaucrat is Cerberus and @Bureaucat is Hydra

[–] buh@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It Bureaucrat logs off, the entire world ends

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[–] UmbraVivi@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago
[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

I've logged off before, it just made some random terf with 64 friends on facebook stub her toe really hard. Kind of a let down tbh.

[–] Carcharodonna@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Some random middle-aged guy from Ohio named Dave. This is why I must never log off, for Dave’s sake.

[–] Utter_Karate@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If I log off Bill Maher dies. It's a huge responsibility.

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[–] Bureaucrat@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago

And if that's the case, why haven't you logged off yet?

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If I log off, it is because I have died. I am not certain that I exist outside of the bear site. This simulacrum has only a tangential relation to the meatsack that operates it.

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Oh wait it's also possible that the meatsack lost the password, that's been known to happen.

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

In that case, the spirit would live on.

[–] mathemachristian@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Merkel timmy-pray I could settle for Scholz

[–] Bureaucrat@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

nah, we should kill scholz and use his head as a bowling ball

[–] iridaniotter@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I'm responsible for 85% of a band's scrobbles so presumably them. I must never log off. I must never stop shoegazing.

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[–] TheLastHero@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

social-democracy

it's not old age, you don't even want to know. Believe me. And I'd spoil the surprise ;)

[–] Mardoniush@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

Only thing besides death or banning that will make me log off is the Revolution so A Lot Of People.

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