chapotraphouse

At my first internship my car's timing chain snapped on the bw parkway. Harrowing is... An accurate description of the wait for a tow.

It took weeks to get a new engine, luckily my dad was willing and able to pay for a used engine to be installed and I could use public transit to get to work from my newly acquired sublet.

I was doing the "subway to bus to half mile walk" thing for two months or so (almost the whole internship).

I mentioned that I needed to leave at 345 to catch the 4 o'clock bus to a senior coworker and he asked why. I explained the car situation and he said "why don't you just get a new car, they're much nicer."

It was the first time I realized that there were people who simply assumed that driving a 20 year old shitbox was an aesthetic choice or something.

Mind blowing.

"Just have even less comfort and joy in your life. Sleep less. Turn yourself into a revenue stream for capitalism and accept the fraction of your labor value you get back from your sacrifice." /r/GetMotivated

I have douchebag petite bourgeoisie relatives that have a similar attitude as OP's situation about their life-changing epiphany-laden "you haven't lived until you bungee jumped" world-hopping vacation flexing.

"You haven't lived until you've had authentic Turkish tea. Why haven't you gone to Turkey yet? Oh right, you're scared of trying new things. No excuses. No excuses is why I can get Turkish tea and you let life pass you by. Carpe diem. That's Latin, you know..."

for real, jesus christ. does "I can't afford it" mean something else for other people???? I remember I had an acquaintance back when who just didn't seem to get the concept of not affording something.

"come to the thing!" sorry I'm broke, I can't afford it. "yeah okay but you could still come" bro what I literally have seventeen cents to my name "oof yeah I get it, but you could come though?" What, just fucking smooth-talk my way in without a ticket? "no man the tickets are cheap, come on, it'll be fun"

They weren't even out-of-touch-levels of rich or even all that well off. I never understood, and I never thought to ask them what they think "can't afford" means. Wild.

And it's a trope that nobody really enjoys a destination wedding in the first place

Like there's multiple avenues that tell you it's a bad idea

But they just keep doing it

This is the classic coping mechanism of wealthier people (and others emulating / sucking up to them).

They have to regard being poor as a choice, or otherwise face that their own wealth is unearned and it's morally wrong that they have it while others don't. To them "I can't afford it" is synonymous with "I don't want to" because thinking otherwise destroys their world view.

A lot of Email job types think that "I can't afford it" is "It will mean I have to not go to a fancy resturaunt twice a month" and not "I literally will be unable to pay for rent and food if I do this." The idea that they're friends with actual poor people is hard to process.

Weddings held abroad are ways for couples to deter relatives and friends from joining; cutting costs and giving an out to people who don't want to go.

Your former friends were in search of an excuse to ostracize you

destination wedding?

just fuckin elope and enjoy the destination shit with the person you love, and then have a wider celebration with friends and family in a way that can actually involve your friends and family. jesus christ

i chose to be wealthy and that's what happened!

"If you can't afford to come to our wedding you are choooooosing to miss out on life because attending our boring overpriced shitty divorce prequel is the epitome of human experience!!"

Capitalist ideology and unwarranted self-importance is one hell of a combo. Fuck those stupid morally bankrupt goatfuckers.

Come on, Dirt_Owl, you have bootstraps just like everyone else. If you really wanted to, you could pull on those a little harder. The fact that you don't just means you don't care about other people, especially people who do. If you keep being so selfish and expecting everyone else to accommodate you just because you're "poor," then what's next? Are you going to start whining like all those welfare-sucking dirty homeless who have it so easy with no adult responsibilities but are always complaining about how those of us good and hard-working people who did make the right decision to pull on our bootstraps owe them a mansion or something? Ew. Don't pretend like this isn't entirely your decision to be this way.

Another Dirt_Owl banger

I thought this was going to be something way cheaper than a destinarion wedding holy shit

I hate people like that. People who rub all their traveling in your face as a status symbol. It's so much more common to see these days. It just ruffles all my left populist feathers.

On the upside, you won't have to hear about them complaining how they had to put $60,000 on credit cards to pay for the destination wedding

It’s kind of why I stopped using “basement dweller” as an insult. Especially in the modern day, it just feels like you’re mocking someone for being an icky icky poor person.

Come to think of it, poor people always have how much they spend of save money scrutinized but never rich people. If a rich person was caught intentionally doing wage theft, there’d be excuse after excuse of smuglords saying “it’s financial literacy sweaty”, but if a poor person lives with their parents to build savings, they’re seen as losers. Possibly fueled in no small part that some landlord deserves that money.

Weddings are consistently the most miserable experiences I've ever had the misfortune of experiencing. They're always so much drama as well, tbh I find if someone i know is a big wedding enthusiast i can guarantee we won't get along and have opposing ideology. Oh and the wedding gift shit is so stupid, like I was best man had to do all these ridiculous pre divorce prequel events, buy a suit, pay for accommodation and travel and when i get there "oh we want a gift in cash please" like i haven't spent an entire paycheck on the twatting wedding already. U can have a tesco meal deal and some pocket lint you nonce. "Oh but its a once in a lifetime thing" yeah my life is a once in a lifetime thing yet i don't see you showering me in money and bullshit.

If i was gonna have a wedding it would be a house party follow by a hexbear post party.

Lol fuck destination weddings. One of my best friends had theirs at a vineyard in a swanky part of a neighboring city and i didn't have to pay a dime.

I'm sorry you had that experience though. That's really shitty.

I cut off a friend who kept pressuring me to visit him in another city, seeming to ignore my issues with my car and the hassle of parking/ driving. The last straw was sending a venmo request for an outing he begged me to stay for after already twisting my arm with the visit itself.

If that person can't acknowledge your material conditions, they're not your friend.

And you know they'd give you shit if you didn't bring an adequately expensive gift.

I simply wouldn't associate with such gross people.