this post was submitted on 08 Apr 2024
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askchapo

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Ask Hexbear is the place to ask and answer ~~thought-provoking~~ questions.

Rules:

  1. Posts must ask a question.

  2. If the question asked is serious, answer seriously.

  3. Questions where you want to learn more about socialism are allowed, but questions in bad faith are not.

  4. Try !feedback@hexbear.net if you're having questions about regarding moderation, site policy, the site itself, development, volunteering or the mod team.

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[–] Rom@hexbear.net 55 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Server admins were deep into a 14-hour goon sesh and didn't notice

[–] theposterformerlyknownasgood@hexbear.net 30 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

She said wrong answers only

[–] sovietknuckles@hexbear.net 48 points 11 months ago (1 children)

There was a hard drive failure, and they restored from a 2023 backup. The 9 hours of downtime was spent making 6 months' worth of plausible-looking posts

[–] Zangief@hexbear.net 37 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

WHO TOLD YOU?

[–] dannoffs@hexbear.net 41 points 11 months ago
[–] DirtyPair@hexbear.net 39 points 11 months ago

i chewed through the servers power cable, nyaa~

[–] LibsEatPoop@hexbear.net 36 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] QuillcrestFalconer@hexbear.net 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The eclipsed blocked the solar panels powering the server

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[–] blight@hexbear.net 29 points 11 months ago

30-50 feral hogs headbutted the servers

[–] marxisthayaca@hexbear.net 28 points 11 months ago

Because Capitalism is actually the most efficient way of operating a website

[–] EndMilkInCrisps@hexbear.net 27 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 23 points 11 months ago

DPRK officials be like "why don't they like our cool photo kitty-birthday-sad "

[–] Findom_DeLuise@hexbear.net 26 points 11 months ago

I typed "Exxon Valdez NUTS" into the comment box and the site couldn't handle my power level

Oh shit, I just did it again oh god oh fuck I don't wanna touch the grass again nooooo NOOOOO

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 25 points 11 months ago

we banned all the liberals but then decided that you're cool anyway

[–] Zangief@hexbear.net 25 points 11 months ago

the servers got drunk celebrating the eclipse.

[–] ashinadash@hexbear.net 25 points 11 months ago

The mods & admins were trying in vain to stop future badposting from me.

They failed. Look out stress

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 25 points 11 months ago

I strongly believe in the benefits of going out, so I unplugged the site for awhile so you kids could play

[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 24 points 11 months ago

A wizard did it.

That wizard?

He came from the moon.

[–] Sasuke@hexbear.net 23 points 11 months ago

a second PIGPOOPBALLS hit the servers

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 23 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Solar flare emp over the server farm on an abandoned research oil rig in the Indian ocean.

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 17 points 11 months ago

Is this mgs2?

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 23 points 11 months ago

Somebody wanted to torture me by taking away my Hexbear content on the very day Bluesky is having 100,000,000+ "like farming" posts about the goddamned eclipse.

Okay, whoever you are - I'm sorry for whatever I did. Please don't do this to me again.

[–] cmhickman358@hexbear.net 22 points 11 months ago

Xi's check didn't come through since the Chinese economy is tanking so they had to take down the site until he could borrow the money from Kim and wire over the server fees.

[–] SexUnderSocialism@hexbear.net 22 points 11 months ago
[–] GunslingerSky@hexbear.net 20 points 11 months ago

Too many piss

[–] BurningVIP@hexbear.net 19 points 11 months ago
[–] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 17 points 11 months ago

I clicked the purge everything button

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 17 points 11 months ago
[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago

God punished us for gay.

[–] Utter_Karate@hexbear.net 16 points 11 months ago

Imbalance of the humors. Too much phlegm, not enough black bile.

[–] trompete@hexbear.net 15 points 11 months ago

Sabotage by lemmygrad to steal users.

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 15 points 11 months ago
[–] Egon@hexbear.net 15 points 11 months ago

All libs were banned. Sadly this killed the site, because it's all libs, so the process had to be undone.

[–] ChaosMaterialist@hexbear.net 14 points 11 months ago
[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 13 points 11 months ago

A solar eclipse happens on Thatcher Day and Hexbear goes down. Coincidence?

[–] Parsani@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago
[–] Ho_Chi_Chungus@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago
[–] TheSpectreOfGay@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago

i wanted to take a nap but didn't want to miss anyone so i just asked really nicely to pause the site

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago

A piano fell on the server and when the server smiled its teeth were piano keys

[–] FunkyStuff@hexbear.net 10 points 11 months ago

My Bill Gates post got us taken down by the pedophile cabal.

[–] take_five_seconds@hexbear.net 10 points 11 months ago

I tripped over the cord soz

[–] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 10 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 10 points 11 months ago

Trisolarans afraid of our advanced bad posting technology they locked the site

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[–] Aquilae@hexbear.net 9 points 11 months ago

Capitalist counter revolution

[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 8 points 11 months ago
[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 8 points 11 months ago

Nerds unplugged Hexbear to plug in their rock tumbler.

[–] dumbass@lemy.lol 8 points 11 months ago

Sorry, my bad, I knocked the power cable out from the server when I trying to pick up my popcorn.

[–] fubarx@lemmy.ml 7 points 11 months ago

It ran out of Chips.

[–] TomBombadil@hexbear.net 7 points 11 months ago
[–] wtypstanaccount04@hexbear.net 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Welcome Back, Mr. McDonald was so good that it broke the site.

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